Chicken Little

Remember two years ago???  We were supposed to all die of Bird Flu.
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Then this year... we shifted to the Swine Flu which was supposed to be a global pandemic which would wipe a lot us out.  Obama was teaching us to sneeze into our sleeves.
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All the while, global warming was supposed to be killing us as soon as the polar bears were done in.  Al Gore won an Academy Award because of it.  The problem here is that it is freaking cold out there, and the European Global Summit in Copenhagen was snowed out.   Florida fruit growers are going to be hit hard with frozen fruit due to the plunging temps.
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Not to mention the myth that the American Health care system doesn't work, and that the Democrats will "fix" it.
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Do you ever get the idea that the leftys are trying to scare the shit out of us?  Kind of like, create a problem then offer themselves as the solution.
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How many times do they expect us to swallow this Chicken Little, the Sky is Falling, Bullshit???
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Let's send them a message from Massachusetts next Tuesday.  They have the audacity to think that the US Senate seat that has been occupied by Ted Kennedy is their heirloom.  Let's vote for Scott Brown and shock the shit out of these phonies.

Lauren Rathbone, former POTY said...

I am so glad that this blog supports Scott Brown. I cannot stand Martha Coakley!!!

Big Momentum

With less than a week to go in the Massachusetts US  Senate special election, Scott Brown has tied Martha Coakley in the polls. 
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Obviously, the Nanepashemet Endorsement has put Scott in front of the Big Mo.
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Coakley attack ads accuse Brown of being anti-liberal.  That he actually doubts that Global Warming is caused by humans. That he wishes to kill Obama Health Care.  Thanks for clarifying that.
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Keep those ads coming Martha.  We didn't give that seat over and over to Kennedy because he was liberal.   He got the votes because he was a Kennedy, and you are no Kennedy.
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Those lefty ads will sweep Brown comfortably into the seat.

Maria Rowen said...

Martha, Martha, Martha… Please stop calling me at home to ask for my vote. You have done less than nothing to deserve it. But give Lois Thistletwat a call. She is itchin’ to make you her queen. My name is Maria Rowen and I approve this message.

Inflated Accomplishment

Martha Coakley keeps running these television advertisements about how, as the Massachusetts State Attormey General, she has saved taxpayers a Billion Dollars, tamed the banks and insurance companies.... yada, yada, yada.
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Martha.... if you were that good, don't you think that you would have gotten the Nanepashemet Nod???
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If you did all of the good that you say you did, it would be a tossup between canonization as a living Saint, or coronation as our new Queen.  You would have been toasted and feted at every turn, instead of running scared as Scott Brown closes the gap in the polls.
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So maybe there is a little Bullshit being slung here....
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You should tell the people what you believe in, and what you would do as our United States Senator....not regale us with tales of your self indulgent superhero feats.
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Don't embarrass yourself.

Tuna Lips said...


The mug on this gal, with that gob of hers drawn up in a big ole suck face, brings amind Lois Thistletwat, the hard chargin' teen that absconded with my virtue and left me a drawer full o' crushedasians that no reglar soap could scrub aways, had me pawwin' at my rooster fer weeks. I say get thee to a nuttery, you brillo snatched she demon!


Pisc said...

In that pose, she looks like the wife of Judge Smails (Ted Knight) from CaddyShack.

Judge Elihu Smails said...


This is Martha (we can call her pooky), christening the "Flying Wasp":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGpQej3o9eo

Half Marathon

Ryan put in 13 miles on the Fort Devens track in 1 hr. 49 min. today.   I think his secret plan is to kick some Kenyan ass in the Boston Marathon a couple of years hence.
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Or maybe he has another secret plan.

Let the Beatings Begin

Senator Harry Reid (D) , Majority Leader said that President Obama is "too light skinned, and only speaks with a Negro dialect when he wants".
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Uh Oh.  Free speech aside, he is about to get a "political correctness" old fashioned ass whupping.
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It did seem like Obama would adjust his speech to fit the crowd during the campaign, but most Dems seem to pander that way.  And Obama seems to have skin that would befit his caucasian mother and negro father.  So his skin seems genetically correct.
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Not sure what "too light skinned" would actually mean anyway.  I hope I'm not "too light skinned".
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So I guess the Senate Majority leader has entered the "political correctness shitstorm" with some questionable facts.
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Let the beatings begin.

~

Pisc said...

I have an affinity for the precision of the moniker "douche bag". This chap is a douche bag. You know he got whacked upside the head playing kill ball, or dodge ball as it is referred to among the gentry.

Post Season Pats

Patriots lost to the Baltimore Ravens and are out of the playoffs.
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It's not like I'm going to off myself or anything.
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It's only Professional Football.
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But it's still damn depressing.
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At least we had a nice visit to FreshAyer this morning.   Ryan was his usual upbeat, forward thinking, self.  I guess life's not so bad if watching the Pats is more depressing than going to FreshAyer.

Lag Time

I've been spending a lot of time on the weight loss book lately.  Since it's about me, it really holds my interest.  Plus, there is nothing really screwed up going on.
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Obama is saying a lot of nothing in his security speeches, and seems almost to be putting the health care fiasco on the back burner.
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We're waiting to see if the Nanepashemet endorsement causes Scott Brown to win the Senate race.
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The NFL playoffs are just getting underway.
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Tiger's sex life seems to have blown over... so to speak.
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So I might as well use this lag time to move the future New York Times bestseller along.  I find the subject matter utterly fascinating.

Maria Rowen said...


Why stop there? You should probalby start thinking about the movie rights. Then of course, who will play the Mountain of a Man on the big screen...?

Excellent Point Maria.   I'm thinking Clooney or Pitt.

POTW Week One of 2010

After all of the Peep of the Year Hoopla, it's back to good old Peeps of the Week.
I'm glad the holidays are over and we can get down to business.

ANNOUNCING....

Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for the First Week of 2010

Maria Rowen

Pat Piscatelli

Scott Brown

Steve Lewis

Carrie Paige DeBlasi

Jim Lundgren

A fresh new year.   A Brand New Decade!   Imagine the possibilities.
All we have to do is dodge the Mayan's and we have a new Lease on Life!

Badass POTY

Because he is no longer local to the Boston area, quite a few of the Peeps have been bothering me with emails regarding details of the POTY, Jeremy Johnson.
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Click on this Link and knock yourself out.
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As you can see, Jeremy is no Pussy.  He's a Badass Up and Coming Minnesota attorney.
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Now you can bother Jeremy directly and leave me alone.

Pisc said...

Though not readily apparent, the essence of the Nuremberg defense is infused in this cop out. Let's start this off easy, low hanging fruit if you will. Has he ever provided a bottle of Lagavulin? If no, then should there not be an automatic yer not the peep of the year rule for such an ommission?

Maria Rowen said...

Wow! This POTY also gets the PEEPle's Choice 2010, Maybe someday he will let us see his briefs!Now..let's all celebrate 'Jeremy' with a nice big slice of poor-loser-pie. __________________________________________________________________________________________  

Amanda Johnson said.....

Jay, I want names.  Who the hell is questioning Big J Furious Esq's well-deserved honor and general roundhouse-in-your-eye-mutha-suckah-badassness?  I swear to baby Jesus, I will crush skulls.   ___________________________________________________________________________________________ Amanda -   It was Piscatelli and Rowen.   I had nothing to do with it! If you need their addresses, I'll look them up for you.   Please leave my skull out of this. - J  _________________________________________________________________________________________

Maria Rowen said...

Ms. Johnson, with all due respect, I have the biggest, born-in-Lynn bada** in town (40 Badass Street, Swampscott, Massachusetts 01907-1903). Furthermore, I am 100% in support of 2010 POTY and I don't even know him. But, I respect the MoaM and the rules. And for the record, I am very attached to my head. __________________________________________________________________________________ Amanda -  Since you live in LA and Maria lives in Swampscott.... and since both of you can probably kick my ass... I agree with Maria. Maybe I'll change my mind when you come back this way. -J

 

Nanepashemet Nod for Senate

It's time to announce the all-important Nanepashemet Blog Massachusetts Senate Race endorsement.
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Since this will undoubtably decide the outcome of the race, I've had to deliberate long and hard.   But with both Scott Brown and Martha Coakley pestering me daily and constantly, I have to put an end to the angst and speculation.
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I've noticed that the Kennedy clan have thrown their support to Coakley, despite her grabbing at the nomination before Ted's corpse was cold.   Even while holding their noses, the Kennedy's can't imagine that a Republican would occupy their family heirloom (ie Ted's Senate Seat).
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In the end, our endorsement was fairly easy to make.... Scott drives a truck, might even be a Ford F150, and Martha dissed one of my favorite  Peeps in the recent past by saying that she didn't need her help with her campaign.  Plus Martha's lips look funny when she is talking like she has a mouth full of marbles.
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So it's clear that Scott Brown gets the Nanepashemet Nod.
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As our President has said repeatedly, "It's time for a change."
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Don't worry Scott.  This endorsement comes with no strings attached.  Athrough if you could throw one of those  no-bid fat government contracts to Nanepashemet Telecom, it would be kindly appreciated.

Google Assist

Google announced today it's new smart phone, the Nexus One, designed  to compete with the Apples IPhone.
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What does this mean?
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It means revenue for Nanepashemet Telecom, that's what! 
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As more of you demand wireless bandwidth to run the applications that are becoming essential, such as my LoseIt! iPod program, you will need more wireless infrastructure.   More Antennas, more Towers.
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Way to go Google.

Next year, all of the Peeps will be downloading my book onto your cool device.
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Would you consider offering me an advance??

Tuna Lips said...

I gots an cool-like add on youse might try . . . thuh not be a borin' d-bag app. This thing we got done gone stupid borin' since "Jeremy" (what, yer mammy and pappy dudn't give you a right Christian name like Jeremiah, theys kow tow to them Obamamy fruit pie type is screwin up my U S of A?) got his trophy? This here business' akin to the WBO, WBC, WBA, and WWF (my genre, natchally), where any three time loser junkie can gits a belt. Lets me water this tomchickery down some mo by shakin' my monster overs this peeps of the year gnome deploomery.

Book Announcement

Peeps -
I'm writing the book that I told you about.  It will be compiled over the course of the year, and I already have 60 or so pages written.
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It's a about a Big Guy who lost 60 lbs weight in 2010 and is tentatively entitled.  "Don't Call Me Fat Shit Anymore."  I hope like hell that it is non-fiction by the time I'm done.
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If you have any vignettes, anecdotes or other literary contributions that you would like to add to this effort, please feel free to email me.
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I won't mention your name in the book without your permission, or unless you really piss me off. (Which means that quite a few names could be mentioned, so I have a legal fund earmarked for this just in case).
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When this hits the New York Times Best Seller list, you will have the satisfaction that you have made a miniscule contribution albeit without any compensation.
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Appreciate your involvement.

-  J "Mountain of a Man" Nestor

Maria Rowen said...

One of your earlier chapters could be entitled: "Big Rig and a Barstool". Feel free to claim full literary licence with your own Nom de Plume!

Pain in the Obama

I decided that I should go to the Doctor today to check out this pain in my abdomen.   After the rubber glove routine, my physician pointed out (so to speak) that an infection in my prostate was not the culprit.
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OK.
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Now I had a whole new source of discomfort, and still have a freaking pain in my pre-private area.
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I wish this was one of those things that you could blame on the Obama administration, but it could have happened even if Bush was still in office.
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Maybe tomorrow the results of the urine test will be more productive..... and less invasive..

Pisc said...

Like your prostate exam, the Health Care Debates will not be covered by C-Span. So you and Barry have that connection. Trasparency is overrated once you are the King.

Outgoing POTY Address

Lauren Rathbone, 2009 Peep of the Year, has given the following inspirational POTY annual outgoing address....

I was just reading the blog, I have been in North Conway all week with no Internet, and had to first read the peep of the year selection 2010. I sadly did this before getting my kids out of the car, before feeding my family, before unpacking the car, and before I checked facebook. Jason was really thrilled with my priority list. I was sure Brian Butler was going to get the title. I know his new years day was ruined by this.

I congratulate Jeremy on the PEEP of the year 2010. I am ready to move on from the title. I have an idea of why I was given it last year. But my guess is I will never really know. When I look at the picture of my kids and I on the blog last year it made me realize that a year goes by super fast! And a lot can change in a year. I will try not to take things for granted. I will try to laugh when Ethan and Beckett fight all day, color the entire living room with magic markers, throw food at each other, because I know next year things could and will be completely different.

I hope all the peeps have a safe, healthy, and fun 2010!!!!
- Lauren Rathbone

Jeremy Johnson's Acceptance Speech.

Did you see Jeremy's acceptance a few posts down???
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As most of you know, I don't tear up easily.
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But I'm so misty now, I can hardly write.
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I think he got me at "facial hair".

Outgoing POTY, Lauren Rathbone said...


Did you get my remarks on email?

I didn't get those Lauren, and will promptly insert them in accordance with you status as soon as they are received.
- J


Maria Rowen said...

Jeremy, your-Hairy-Highness. Bring on the bounty of benevolence but promise that all mystical powers in the world of worlds do not bear a beard for a prissy peep like me...

Apology Offered

Please accept my apology if I insult you in any way with this Blog, but I think that political correctness is cowardly and obscene. I believe in live and let live, but if I think that you are a jerk, I have no problem letting you know. Honesty and loyalty occupy the top shelf in my pantry.

Chick Flick Pain

It's Saturday during a three day weekend.   That's probably my favorite day plus I have no crisis to attend to, or immediate obligation.
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So I think I'll sit on this couch for awhile and watch Saturday morning cable fishing shows.   And when they are over, I'll probably sit and watch something else.
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Unless Joanne starts to watch Chick Flick shows on the Women's Channel.
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Then I'll do something better, like twist a high speed drill bit into my forehead.
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That would actually be less painful than another day of Chick Flicks.
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Don't get me wrong.   I have my feminine side.... but I think that my feminine side is kind of a slut.
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It would be great if they showed porn once in awhile on the Women's Channel.

Tommy O is In.

Tommy O just came across the street and announced that he is in to lose 52 lbs. this year as well.
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Good Luck Big Guy.
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We'll track your progress.

Pisc said...


Who is we? The august we? You sound like some French King with the we shit, or Brian Williams.

Keep it real.



Maria Rowen said...

With my degree in Nutrition, I feel confident in making a couple of dietary recommendations: Surrender the Sara Lee and grab some grapes. Saute spinach in stock, and grill a nice filet of fish...but...skip the tuna. It's oily and full of mercury.

Big Guy

I hate it when somebody calls me “Big Guy”.    And everybody thinks that it is cool to do so.   Waiters in restaurants, friends, family…. It doesn’t matter.
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But when they call me “Big Guy”,   there is no way that they are referring to my just barely six foot  height.  They were referring to my 257 lbs. of body mass.   Some muscle and bone, but a significant part of it is flabby fat that has no place on the body of a Mountain of a Man like myself.
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I’ve always had this internal picture of myself as “Rough, Touch, Hard to Bluff and Damn Good Looking”.  In reality though, I was a “Big Guy” aka “Fat Shit”.
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So every time someone says “Thanks, Big Guy” or “See you later, Big Guy”, I know that they are really saying  “Thanks, Fat Shit”.
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In High School and College, I was on the Cross Country and Track teams running long distance, and I ran the Boston Marathon when I was 18 years old.  I weighed in the 150 lb. range, depending upon the level of training at the time.   Granted, I didn’t feel comfortable at that weight.   The bones in my buttocks actually bothered me when I sat on a wooden stool.
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Over 100lbs and 30 odd years later, I don’t have that problem on a bar stool.
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But I hate it when the bartender says, “What can I get you, Big Guy?”.
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This year, I'm going to lose 60 lbs and get below 200 lbs again.   And I'm going to write a book entitled  "Don't Call Me Fat Shit." or something like that.

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That is my New Year's Resolution.



Harvey Rowe said...

Good luck Big Guy on the resolution.However remember if you keep doing the same things and they never work you are bordering on"crazy acts".....I am willing to share my "DAPPER PLAN " with you......but trust me it will not be easy.....Let me know.


Thanks Harvey.
I agree that my selves are all stocked up on "crazy", but I'll have to pass on the "DAPPER PLAN".  I'm frankly too scared to ask what that plan is.

Nanepashemet Peep of the Year - 2010

When you look at the history of  this pathetic yet honorable designation....

Tom McMahon 2007
Michael "Murph" Murphy 2008
Lauren Rathbone 2009

.... there really isn't a discernible pattern.    But all three have their strengths and weaknesses, and they all survived their year of glory/ridicule.

So today, the momentous decision arises again.
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There was a huge pack of candidates to choose from this year.  You know yourself how many annoying and/or inspirational things you did this year.  So do I.
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I let my guard down earlier this week and joked with SuperPeep Lindsey Kepnes that she was under consideration.  Sorry Lindsey.   And my sister-in-law Sue Sue Raiche made a last minute run at it this morning to no avail.  No such luck Sue Sue.  And how could Tuna Lips Antagonist Maria Rowen be ignored.... or the perennial also-ran, SuperPeep Brian Butler???    Both came up short.  There's always next year.
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Even with all of the worthy candidates during a year that was itself, annoying and inspirational, one Peep emerged above all others.   Peep Protocol demands that there can be no explanation for the choice, and I will abide by this sacrosanct tenet, but those of you who know Jeremy and what he did this year can easily figure it out.
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ANNOUNCING ......

Nanepashemet Peep of the Year 2010

Jeremy Johnson

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Good luck this year Jeremy.  Shortly you will feel the almost mystical power that this honor/disgrace entails.  May you reign with all of  humility and arrogance that your title bestows upon you in the coming year.

Maria Rowen said...


Peak-Peep-Perfomance-Prevails for Jeremy! Congratulations and enjoy the honor and disgrace...364 days, 9 hours, 31 minutes and counting...

Jeremy Johnson, Reigning PEEP OF THE YEAR said....
Wow, I'm honored. The POTY powers are no joke – I woke up this morning with a Chuck Norris-style beard. And to think I had given up years ago on this lifelong dream. What’s next? I don’t know, but obviously the sky’s the limit. I’m just taking it one day at a time, looking forward with great anticipation to a year of reaping the vast bounty of goodwill, good luck, and great facial hair growth that accompanies this honorable designation. I promise all of the NPash Peeps that I'll keep it real -- my reign will be marked by benevolence, bipartisanship, and some old school trickle-down economics. 2009 was indeed a trying year but I realized how fiercely loyal, thoughtful and downright badass all of you peeps are. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no. 2010 will indeed be a better year -- 2012 will be outstanding.