Cool November Row

It was a clear, cool November mornng today, and I took the opportunity to catch the high tide at 11:00AM to row the Tender from River Head Beach to the green can at the beginning of the Marblehead Harbor. The swells were rolling right into the Harbor, and crashing spray onto the rocks at the Barnicle and the Lighthouse.
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The harbor was pretty empty and most of the boats were hauled. I smashed into a number of moorings, but the Tender seemed oblivious to it.
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It was a pain hauling out on the concrete ramp however, and the strip of naval brass that was epoxied to the keel was ripped off. Luckily I found it on the adjacent beach, and I'll have to screw it back on. The epoxy alone obviously wasn't enough.
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When I finally got the Tender back on the trailer, Abby Bruett showed up and I helped her and Greg haul the Mystic Krewe onto their trailer. Good timing.

Dale Johnson's Nostalgic Fashion Retreat

Dale and Gail Johnson sent me this Blog entry. It was painfully hard to get the pictures right and after a while, I just gave up. But it is pretty funny and worth the effort.

This is entirely Dale's narrative.
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Last weekend I put an exhaust fan in the ceiling for my wife's grandfather. While my wife's brother and I were fitting the fan in between the joists, we found something under the insulation. What we found was this:



A JC Penney catalog from 1977. It's not often blog fodder just falls in my lap, but holy hell this was two solid inches of it, right there for the taking. I thumbed through it quickly and found my next dining room set, which is apparently made by adding upholstery to old barrels:

Also, I am totally getting this for my bathroom:



There's plenty more home furnishings where those came from, however I'm not going to bore you with that. Instead, I'm going to bore you with something else. The clothes.

The clothes are fantastic.

Here's how to get your ass kicked in elementary school:



Just look at that belt. It's like a boob-job for your pants. He probably needed help just to lift it into place. The belt loops have to be three inches long. And way to pull them up to your armpits, grandpa.

Here's how to get your ass kicked in high school:



This kid looks like he's pretending to be David Soul, who is pretending to be a cop who is pretending to be a pimp that everyone knows is really an undercover cop. Who is pretending to be 15.

Here's how to get your ass kicked on the golf course:



This "all purpose jumpsuit" is, according to the description, equally appropriate for playing golf or simply relaxing around the house. Personally, I can't see wearing this unless you happen to be relaxing around your cell in D-block. Even then, the only reason you should put this thing on is because the warden made you, and as a one-piece, it's slightly more effective as a deterrent against ass-rapery.

Here's how to get your ass kicked pretty much anywhere:



If you look at that picture quickly, it looks like Mr. Bob "No-pants" Saget has his hand in the other guy's pocket. In this case, he doesn't, although you can tell just by looking at them that it's happened - or if it hasn't happened it will. Oh yes. It will. As soon as he puts down his matching coffee cup.

Here's how to get your ass kicked at the beach:



He looks like he's reaching for a gun, but you know it's probably just a bottle of suntan lotion in a holster.

How to get your ass kicked in a meeting:

If you wear this suit and don't sell used cars for a living, I believe you can be fined and face serious repercussions, up to and including termination. Or imprisonment, in which case you'd be forced to wear that orange jumpsuit.

Tommy the Astronomer

Tommy O says that he saw a fireball like object in the sky over Beverly Ave. a couple of nights ago.

Look at the email he sent me.

Hi Jay,

This is making me a little crazy; I have been online looking to see if there were any other chuckleheads who saw this thing.

As I investigate I find that this may have been a “fireball”. Take a look at the photo below as this is exactly what I saw and the rest of the world did not.

Regards, TommyO

There are obvious problems with this email. First of all Tom, you were a little crazy long before seeing this so called "fireball" . Second, they are not "chuckleheads"... the proper nomenclature is "Peeps".

Now this is going to cause a whole new rash of hysterical emails. Thanks alot Tommy.

Another Convert

Yesterday, at various and repeated times, McMahon, Vona, Rafe, Frankie James and a girl whose name I forgot came by to drink their beers and Twisted Tea and sit with Joanne and I. They wanted to see the progress on the Dory, which was embarrassing, because of the sad progress attained on that all important project.
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I introduced Frankie to the virtues of Lagavulin though, so it wasn't all bad.

Dream On

I got up at 5:30AM this morning to get a glass of juice to drink. A night of snoring can really cause a killer case of dry mouth. My cat Roenick was dancing around at the door to be let out. I knew that with the subfreezing morning chill, that he'd regret that decision if I decided to go back to bed... which I did.
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Normally I would search for the channel changer and find some cool program on the History Channel to try to wake up to, but the channel changer was missing so I decided to drift back off to sleep and pay attention to my dreams.
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Man... Dreams can be so crazy. The way things seem so logical as you are dreaming them, then you wake up and say "How does a volleyball transform into a Cat????" and "Why was I gagged and wearing earmuffs at a company picnic?" and even much weirder stuff that is hard to articulate.
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It is amazing that when you are dreaming, these images and transformations seem perfectly tuned to reality. Then when you wake up and think about it, you say to yourself, "WTF!!!"
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Naturally, a bunch of you wise ass Peeps are going to make stupid remarks of what these images reveal about me. Bring it on!!! If you were so damn well adjusted, you wouldn't be logging on to this rediculous Blog.

Getting into the Holiday Spirit

Its the freaking holiday season. You have to admit, this year flew by. With less than two months to go, it's been one of the best and worst years of my life.

Further Fart Fun

Thanks to Jen Geraci "The Little Trooper" for "passing" along this cute little children's story. It was Jen's 20th anniversary at General Dynamics today, and her first time on the Nanepashemet Blog.

I don't know which is more significant.

Friday Forecast

The Patriots have a Bye this weekend, and it seems like another rainstorm is in the forecast. It's probably the perfect weekend to tie up some Nanepashemet Telecom loose ends.
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I don't usually like to work on business during the weekend.... it's healthy to turn away for a two day period. But we have to get all of the small details under wraps as we attack a major procurement that will have a profound effect on our company.
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I know. Once again, the Marblehead Gunning Dory project is fading from view. I obviously haven't forgotten about it, but if I land this business, everything should be moving forward, and I will be able to devote some attention to your precious Dory.

POTW - Week 45

I did something today that I'm not proud of. I'd tell you what it was, but it is kind of too embarrassing. It wasn't illegal or immoral or anything, but for a short while I really felt like a jerk.
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Then I went to Dr. Danny Levy's office and had the baby tooth that had been my left front canine for the last half century yanked. I felt sentimental about it and took it home in an envelope. Not that I believe in the tooth fairy or anything. I asked Joanne if she wanted it mounted in a necklace or something, however, she had no real show of enthusiasm.
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Now I have a full size bridge and my mouth feels completely unnatural. Wonder if this will screw up my public speaking ability? At least Scotch tastes the same.
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For the most part, the dentist trip proved to be cathartic after my embarrassing jerk episode.
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..... So now I'm back to normal.
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Announcing....
Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for Week 45 of 2007

• Pete Endras
• Emily Ingardia
• Rebecca May
• Tanya Towne
  
• Joe Collins
• Tom Faiola

Tomorrow, I'll try to be a better man.... with a brand new smile ;-)

Fart Retort

Most of you took offense to my fart post. The consensus was that it stunk.
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It was one of Tuna Lips best comments, though and bears sharing here.

Tuna Lips said...

Many a night, Shoo Fly and me was hoboin', we'd settled into a tin of baked beans, dash on some catsup, and throw in a piece of salt pork, before an open fire under a starry sky, and we'd fart the William Tell Overture. Tanglewood has nothin to compare.

Its a burden being an artist.

Bird Mystery

It's a cool morning with lots of action at the feeder.... Cardinals, Blue Jays, Chickadees and Sparrows. Earlier this week, there was a small, blue and white, nuthatch type of bird that I haven't been able to locate in my edition of Sibley's Guide to Birds.
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Don't you hate that???
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No worries. I'll solve this mystery soon enough

Sundance Parents

Joanne and I went to a nice reception for Sundance parents put on by Julie Savage and Muffy Paquette tonight at Julie's beautiful home on Flint Street in Marblehead. What a good group of people! They seem to be very enamored with the new school and said that the kids seem more comfortable in it than the previous location. Muffy and Joanne both made nice speeches.
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It was good input to the business decision that we made last year to move.