Further Fart Fun

Thanks to Jen Geraci "The Little Trooper" for "passing" along this cute little children's story. It was Jen's 20th anniversary at General Dynamics today, and her first time on the Nanepashemet Blog.

I don't know which is more significant.

Friday Forecast

The Patriots have a Bye this weekend, and it seems like another rainstorm is in the forecast. It's probably the perfect weekend to tie up some Nanepashemet Telecom loose ends.
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I don't usually like to work on business during the weekend.... it's healthy to turn away for a two day period. But we have to get all of the small details under wraps as we attack a major procurement that will have a profound effect on our company.
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I know. Once again, the Marblehead Gunning Dory project is fading from view. I obviously haven't forgotten about it, but if I land this business, everything should be moving forward, and I will be able to devote some attention to your precious Dory.

POTW - Week 45

I did something today that I'm not proud of. I'd tell you what it was, but it is kind of too embarrassing. It wasn't illegal or immoral or anything, but for a short while I really felt like a jerk.
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Then I went to Dr. Danny Levy's office and had the baby tooth that had been my left front canine for the last half century yanked. I felt sentimental about it and took it home in an envelope. Not that I believe in the tooth fairy or anything. I asked Joanne if she wanted it mounted in a necklace or something, however, she had no real show of enthusiasm.
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Now I have a full size bridge and my mouth feels completely unnatural. Wonder if this will screw up my public speaking ability? At least Scotch tastes the same.
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For the most part, the dentist trip proved to be cathartic after my embarrassing jerk episode.
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..... So now I'm back to normal.
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Announcing....
Nanepashemet Peeps of the Week for Week 45 of 2007

• Pete Endras
• Emily Ingardia
• Rebecca May
• Tanya Towne
  
• Joe Collins
• Tom Faiola

Tomorrow, I'll try to be a better man.... with a brand new smile ;-)

Fart Retort

Most of you took offense to my fart post. The consensus was that it stunk.
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It was one of Tuna Lips best comments, though and bears sharing here.

Tuna Lips said...

Many a night, Shoo Fly and me was hoboin', we'd settled into a tin of baked beans, dash on some catsup, and throw in a piece of salt pork, before an open fire under a starry sky, and we'd fart the William Tell Overture. Tanglewood has nothin to compare.

Its a burden being an artist.

Bird Mystery

It's a cool morning with lots of action at the feeder.... Cardinals, Blue Jays, Chickadees and Sparrows. Earlier this week, there was a small, blue and white, nuthatch type of bird that I haven't been able to locate in my edition of Sibley's Guide to Birds.
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Don't you hate that???
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No worries. I'll solve this mystery soon enough

Sundance Parents

Joanne and I went to a nice reception for Sundance parents put on by Julie Savage and Muffy Paquette tonight at Julie's beautiful home on Flint Street in Marblehead. What a good group of people! They seem to be very enamored with the new school and said that the kids seem more comfortable in it than the previous location. Muffy and Joanne both made nice speeches.
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It was good input to the business decision that we made last year to move.

Fart Facts

Remember Bob Wojcik? That sinister soliciter of subterfuge? That harrowing harbinger of happenstance? Yeah him. He's the one that put my marathon training on ice with his calf stretching advice.

Well he's trying to get back into my good graces by giving me this really interesting documentation from the Mayo Clinic on farts and farting.

Just when you think he can't do anything worse, he sends me this stuff.... and totally redeems himself.

What is intestinal gas?

More than 99 percent of intestinal gas is a mixture of the same odorless gases that are present throughout the environment. These include nitrogen, oxygen, carbon dioxide, hydrogen and sometimes methane. But the exact composition of this mixture varies from person to person, depending on body chemistry and diet.

The nitrogen, oxygen and most of the carbon dioxide in intestinal gas come from the air you swallow when you eat, drink, chew gum or smoke. Chemical reactions in your stomach also produce some of the carbon dioxide content of gas.

Bacteria normally present in the large intestine produce the hydrogen and methane in gas. These bacteria feed on undigested food and release gases during a process called fermentation.

Which foods cause intestinal gas?

Carbonated beverages may cause gas. So can carbohydrates because they often contain indigestible sugars, starches and fiber. For example:

• Lactose. Milk and milk products such as cheese and ice cream, as well as some processed breads, cereals and salad dressings, contain the sugar lactose. While most people can digest lactose with no difficulty, some have trouble because they don't produce any or enough of the enzyme lactase, which splits lactose into digestible parts. Without lactase, milk and other lactose-rich foods ferment in the intestine, releasing excessive gas. People of African, Asian and American Indian descent are most likely to be deficient in lactase.
• Fructose. Onions, artichokes, pears, wheat, and some soft drinks and processed foods contain this sugar, which may be difficult to digest.
• Sorbitol. Apples, pears, peaches, prunes, and some sugar-free foods, candies and chewing gum contain the sugar alcohol sorbitol, another compound that's hard to digest.
• Raffinose. This sugar is found in beans, cabbage, brussels sprouts, broccoli, asparagus and whole grains.

Rice is the only starch absorbed almost completely by the small intestine. Because rice starch never reaches the large intestine, gas-producing bacteria don't break this starch down. But other starches, including potatoes, corn, noodles and wheat, are gas producers. Dietary fiber, found in beans and wheat bran, also tends to produce gas. When research subjects ate a diet in which half of their calories came from pork and beans, they experienced a tenfold increase in their normal gas production.

Pumped Up

Yesterday was a high adrenalin power day for me in business. Gained traction on all fronts and identified some very exciting prospects. If everything that was presented to me yesterday hits paydirt, a lot of people will be taken care of.
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It's important not to get carried away by the adrenalin at times like this. But I vastly prefer it to getting my ass kicked. Best to find a middle ground.

Get Out of Towne

I got a lot of emails from you disgusting Peeps about my roommate Bob Towne.
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No.... He is not the UniBomber. That guy was picked up years ago.
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No.... He was not flexing. Even in college, he was pretty ripped.
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If you want to get really off the wall, I'll post a photo of our buddy, Joe Collins.
So get off my ass. What the hell does your roommate look like?????

Downward Slide

This is my roommate from UMass, Bob Towne who now runs a BLM district in Washington State.
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Bob.... what have you done to yourself????
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How could you let yourself go like that? You should never have let yourself get so out of shape.
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I'm pretty sure that I can still kick your ass.
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I've included a picture of myself when I competed for UMASS thirty odd years ago. No need for an updated picture, because I really haven' t changed much.
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I'll admit that my hair has gotten a bit grayer... but that's it.

Picking Priorities

Emily Ingardia again proves why she is an all time awesome Peep by finding this wicked cool T-shirt on line.
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I know that I should be marketing a full line of Nanepashemet POTW stuff, but there is only so much time in the day.
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Then I'd have to get in the mail order business... so when would the Dory get built????
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Sometimes you just have to compromise.

Impressive Win

Pats won by 4... 24-20. And they had to come from behind to do it. We'll take the win though.
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New England had the most penalty yards in franchise history, yet still won the game against the undefeated Colts in their own stadium.
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This is one special football team... undefeated at 9 and 0.